Now normally I just politely decline the sermon, and free religious
paperwork that such folk pawn off on unsuspecting by-standers. But,
unfortunately for her, she is the fourth car to accost me in the last 9
minutes. So by now I'm beginning to wonder what the heck is wrong
with these people. I mean if it's not Christians, it is the
Jehovah's Witnesses.
Can a simple Druid get no peace?
So calmly as I can muster, without being sarcastic, I reply, "You people
lost him, again??"
The woman looks confused. This is not the response! She was hoping for
and she needs to regroup. She takes a deep breath intending to launch
into her sales pitch for her God, and church, paying no heed to the concept that
I might not be into being converted. I decide to not
let her get going so I launch into a speech of my own.
"What is wrong with you Christians? Every time I turn around you've lost
Him!" I hit her with a glare of accusation.
"I mean really..." I take a measured breath. "How do you expect
to have
anyone follow a deity that you can't even find!"
The poor woman looks stunned. This isn't going so good. Panicked she
looks desperately to the car... Surely one of the men can help....
Undaunted I press on... "Maybe the problem is with you
people. I mean Muslims never seem to loose their deity. Come to think of it
neither do Jews or Pagans of any kind."
I look at the man getting out of the car. He's all smiles. "I realize
you people used to burn people like me at the stake. What was that
about...deity even? I may be a Pagan-heathen, but I have
never ever woke up panicked that I couldn't find my Goddess or God. They are
always right where they should be... In the fire of my candle, in the air that
I breath, in the earth that I stand on, in the water of my spring. I never feel
abandoned by my deity(ies)."
"Of course, you Christians aren't much fun," I continue. By now they
are all out of the car. Befuddled, aghast, and at a loss for words. "Of
course," I offer trying to give them some defense for losing
Jesus. "He could have left due to religious differences. If I remember
correctly, He was Jewish. So if you are really so eager to find him," I
smile gently to soften the blow, "Check the nearest synagogue. He's
probably in there. Also you folks should try and remember that this is
America... Where freedom of religion means ALL religions."
Slowly they climb back into their car and drive away. I stand at the
bus stop... No pamphlets, no bible, no dogma. I haven't found Jesus, but I
haven't lost him either:)
*** I cannot take credit for this, it is a cut and paste job, but I found it amusing and very true in many cases. I hate being accosted at the airport, bus terminal, train station by religious zealots who think they are the only ones who know anything and the rest of us are just lost little fools who will burn in eternal hell fire. I suspect that if that is where I end up, I will have lots of them for company. ****