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Where to learn things

Holy Carp! You have into the world of Sporks! Be afraid, oh so very afraid... This site runs on Scoop: scoop.kuro5hin.org. You can click on that link and become all enlightened, so that your friends will be impressed with how damn 1337 you are. For immediate help, please get the hell off the internet and go talk to a shrink. You'll thank us for it eventually. This is another paragraph. There is no real purpose for it, other than to say, "Look! More words over in that there side bar thingy! Impressive!" Other shit: Pizza is good. Buy us pizza. If you have pictures of the Olsen Twins in the nude, or especially performing lesbian acts on each other, please, for the love of god, post them here. Have you seen my toothbrush? Only you can prevent forest fires.

Poll

What should DJ Vlad name his Radio Show? Vlad's Romper Room Vlad's House of Sex Vlad's House... ON a stick! Vlad the Impala The Wacky Ravin Retro Revolving Elevated Rubber Dementia Warp Gallefreyian Particle House Reading Room Funny Name Theater with Vlad (Spork not included) Vlad Trek Vlad's Virtual Victrola Vlad's Masterworks Staked Out, with Vlad Vlad's Stake-Out! Vlad's First Victim The Big Poke Theatre Vlad's Greetings from Pikesville Vlads generic Transylvanian named show! The Show With The Ever-Changing Name The show without a name A fistful of Vlad A few Vlads more Votes: 6 | Comments: 0 Results | Other Polls

Recent Diaries

Please explain ths to me: by hotmacchick - September 27 I'm admitted to Chickenville by NerdGirl - March 5 4 comments woof by spork testes - November 20 1 comment Your attention please by News For Turds - November 6 1 comment greetings sru by m0rk - September 18 3 comments I bit my tongue by MFS - August 17 Hi by cyborg monkey - July 26 9 comments NerdGirl and I have been married... by Beef - April 14 6 comments Who in the hell is David Anderson? by Strom Thurmond - February 3 3 comments Who's online? by Beef - February 1 1 comment More Diaries...

OMG PR0N!

OMG HAWT PR0N! Imagine if you will... a world populated by only Natalie Portman, Kirsten Dunst, and umm... other hot chicks...

Dear NSA...
By Beef from the ...a little more to the right... perfect! department, Section Fiction Posted on Sun May 21, 2006 at 07:48:15 PM GMT
Dear NSA, Q: Can I substitute margarine for butter in my Toll House cookie recipe? A: We know that you've been smoking pot. (1 comment)

THE COAL MINERS ARE OUT OF DANGER!!!
By Beef from the world's-worst-job-evar department, Section Fiction Posted on Wed Jan 04, 2006 at 07:35:38 PM GMT
...and by "out of danger," we mean "no longer alive." Sorry for any confusion the headline might have caused. PS: Linda, my heart goes out to you if you knew any of them. (2 comments)

Jenny Saga continued+1
By MFS from the the set-up for another one department, Section Fiction Posted on Wed Mar 30, 2005 at 10:13:41 PM GMT
So, like, I wrote more.  Which will lead to more.  Because. (713 words in story)

The Jenny Saga, continued
By MFS from the she's still not dead department, Section Fiction Posted on Sat Mar 12, 2005 at 01:54:51 PM GMT
Yes, I felt like ressurecting Jenny for more death-filled happiness.  Yay. (1 comment, 914 words in story)

Simon Sez ' What the F&*#k!'
By xxxxxxxxxx, Section Fiction Posted on Sun Oct 17, 2004 at 10:32:15 AM GMT
Simon grabbed his cup of coffee on the run as he headed for the front door.  Surely today he would be on time and miss the rush hour traffic. (2 comments, 943 words in story)

Sarah of the Twilight World
By MFS from the troupe of raving lunatics department, Section Fiction Posted on Tue Oct 12, 2004 at 01:24:53 PM GMT
Today, I bring to you a fine tale of joy and happiness.  A story of glee, bliss, and other completely neurotic and ghey things.  Read and enjoy.  Read between the lines, and you might actually realize it has a point. (5 comments, 370 words in story)

"Who Dies in Harry Potter and Half Blood Prince"?
By xxxxxxxxxx, Section Fiction Posted on Sun Oct 10, 2004 at 06:08:25 AM GMT
JK Rowling has given a hint that another character dies in the next installment of Harry Potter, but JK is not telling who! (5 comments, 353 words in story)

A Short Little Bedtime Story
By xxxxxxxxxx, Section Fiction Posted on Tue Aug 31, 2004 at 01:24:58 PM GMT
Once upon a time,......... (8 comments, 435 words in story)

Humanity Reaches a New, All-Time Low
By Beef from the I'm ashamed for my species department, Section Fiction Posted on Tue Aug 03, 2004 at 01:31:05 PM GMT
Now it's easier than ever for you to convince your cooler friends that you really do have a girlfriend in Canada. (6 comments)

Cunt is a "term of endearment."
By Beef from the Whan that Aprille, with hise shoures soote department, Section Fiction Posted on Wed Jun 16, 2004 at 11:17:00 AM GMT
According to Colorado University president Elizabeth Hoffman, the word cunt can be used as a term of endearment for a woman. University spokesman Michele Ames, defending Hoffman, noted that she is a medieval scholar, and that Chaucer himself used "cunt" in a positive light. Well, I guess we know what CU really stands for. And I know Dr. Hoffman would not be at all offended if you said, "Hey, Liz, you're a total cunt!" (12 comments)

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